Top-of-the-line reviews! (The Crigence Critique)

I didnt get to read it why did you delete it

I’m waiting for Browngr to give it quality assurance first, I’ll revoke the deletion when he’s done

Aye (no enemy sprites yet, kinda laggy on chromebook)

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Hello! First submission here; my first ever complete game, which feels weird to say after having been on here for 2+ years hahaha

Join your Plague Doctor in Olive Green rags (for some reason, Browngr makes weird aesthetic choices ok) on a journey to find the cure to the plague! Your patient has given you a magic wand that you can use to manipulate plantlife and nature with, like water and the malicious Evil Ivy!

Go through exciting adventures through Willow Woods, Cold Caverns and Peaceful Plains, all out on your lonesome and surrounded by the animals of Westria!

Enjoy your adventure! Now go get that cure, Doc! You’re running out of time…

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What can I say that hasn’t already been said in the notes? It’s a fun, charming game with an already varied series of minigames - But it needs more; More visuals, more variety in-minigame, more minigames themselves! Apart from that, I’d say this rivals Pixel Sports for best minigame collection on Flowlab!

+OK main menu, but the middle of the wheel not being the center of rotation makes me feel like we’re watching a run-away Ferriswheel (In slow motion)

-No mouse controls on the main-menu? Was is this, DOS?
-Immediantly upon pressing that succulent (2) key, you’ll realize the developer was too-lazy to make a new menu so it’s just a copy of the last, admittedly good, menu.

*I’d say “Good music!” if i didn’t already know it was just remixes of Mario Party songs. At least TRY to be original, man!

+Snowman Arena is an all-around fine minigame, with fun and choatic gameplay. But some random map elements would go a LONG way towards making it funner, along with different types of snowflakes!

-Garbage-ass name, no variety

+Balloon bash is a button masher, which makes it devisive for one, and identical to the billions of other button mashers for two.

-If this minigame was removed, would anyone miss it? (PS: Ballon has no cord, fix it)

+Rhythm Road certainly does a good job at getting the player hooked, but NEEDS more going on visually!

-Varying scores? What are those!? Our brains work in binary here!

+All-in-all, i love where this game is going and its aestetic, it just needs far more of it!
+Charming as

-These games and their win screens NEED instruction menus badly, I shouldn’t have to glare down at the description to see what to do beforehand!
-Lacks options, both in character and in difficulty. At least allow for harder CPU’s!

*"(1) Coming soon" Ah yes, the perks of reviewing a Flowjam game…

Scores (Scale of 1/5)

:eye:Visuals - 3.5 (I like where it’s going)
:speaker:Sound - 3.5 (Needs originality)
:books:Story - 3 (It’s a party game, stories’ not needed here)
:joystick:Controls - 2.5 (Meh, needs work)
:anger:Difficulty - 2 (The default CPU’s succ)
:gear:Stability - 4.5 (How can you have bugs with basic code?)

Final Score: 3.5/5
Good so far, just needs more of everything!

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Since I have announced the “Reviewing Renaissance”, 2 more reviewers have joined in. I’d like to give a shoutout to:



Welcome to the family, son.

Well, today, we finally hit the 1k view milestone (A quarter of what I had BEFORE Discourse but whateva).

This TRUELY is the Reviewing Renaissance

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Let me give you some backstory as to why this game is so special to me: Upon my return to Flowlab a while back, one of the first games submitted to me was “The Facility”, a horror game I thought “Had GREAT potential from what I could see, but it needed more before I deem it a “Horror” game”. And this game finally has EARNED its genre as a horror game! Well done, ManiacPumpkin!

+Amazing first impressions, with a simple, yet effective menu featuring a blood stained cage, busted out from the inside and 1 word: “FLEE”
+The main menu isn’t done being bad-ass yet: For not only is the Start button interactive, but there’s even an amazing zoom-in and fade effect as well! Simple, but does wonders for immersion!
+The game is still on a roll - As the opening cutscene is concise, establishing what’s going on without even saying a word (Then it ruins the moment by doing so)
+The game never explains what you are, in-fact no-one would blame you for being incredibly confused when it turns out the little slime… Thing is the player. But both of these are great decisions in my opinion!
+The effect of kicking-in vents is a nice touch

-This game assaults you with 1 too-many dialogue boxes, especially when the game itself does a good job at explaining that for you. You don’t think the “E” above my head does a good enough job at explaining what VENTS do?
-Annnnnd immediately after your first vent, you see your first example of clunkiness. This part is fine if you head right first, but if you head LEFT first and get big enough beforehand it tells you you’re too small anyway!
-What even IS wrong with the boxes collision?
-The camera getting higher as you get bigger gives me a headache

–In the end: I couldn’t complete the game since, for whatever reason: One object had collision that shouldn’t. Ugh

Scores (Scale of 1/5)

:eye:Visuals - 4 (Superb atmosphere)
:speaker:Sound - 3 (Woo-ooo-woooo)
:books:Story - 3.5 (It’s mysterious in all the right ways)
:joystick:Controls - 3.5 (Does what it needs and not much more)
:anger:Difficulty - 2.5 (Sliding simulator)
:gear:Stability - 3.5 (And it was going so well…)

Final Score: 4/5
From what I COULD see before the box incident: This is a fantastic game, there’s VERY little I’d change about it apart from the occasional bit of clunkiness! Well done


Hello @Crigence here is for your perusal. All art music and code were done in two weeks for the jam. The original concept is from a few scribbled notes in one of my old sketchbooks from 2013. I’ll post them on my page at some point. Have fun!


Hope ya don’t mind

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If you want, you could go in the editor and see the credits. Special thanks to scrap studios for making the art for it.
Anyway thank you for the review, I’m glad you really liked the game for I had a lot of fun making it.

PS: the hit boxes do tend to get really buggy as the player grows and I don’t know how to fix that. The crap ton of tutorial dialogue was because I planned on the game being much longer, lol. Two weeks just wasn’t enough. Anyway thanks.


Here’s my submission for the Flowjam:

It’s a cooking sim(ish) game called Five Star Frenzy. Obviously made in 2 weeks.


I haven’t bothered looking at anything relating to Flowjam 2021, but I’m starting to draw a pattern here judging by the Flowjam games iv’e seen so far…

Is the theme “Growing”?


It is :slightly_smiling_face:

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I’m not positive you didn’t cheat

Let’s get the positives out of the way first: This game has potential, not only to be a good game but to introduce procedurally generated content to the general Flowlab community. The negatives? The games implementation of its main gimmick is horrible and on top of everything else iv’e said about the game, it suffers from the worst thing a game can possibly be: It’s just not fun.

+The main menu is OK (Minus the mysterious, floating plant), but it desperately needs some music
+The scrolling camera is alright, does its job fine
+The procedurally generated levels are neat, but a gimmick is just that: A gimmick. Sure, it’s unique by Flowlab standards but anyone whos played The Binding of Isaac can tell you that this game’s implementation of it is lazy and uninspired
+The games bright, happy exterior hiding a dark, gloomy interior is clever (If misleading)

-Has nobody been reading my previous reviews? Has nobody figured out you have to actually tell the player how to progress in cutscenes? (It’s LMB by the way, ugh)
-Apart from the lack of instruction on the opening cutscene, the cutscene itself is dull and lazy. And no: Being self-aware about you being dull and lazy doesn’t make it OK
-After playing for a little while, it’ll hit you like a ton of bricks that “…Wait a minute, this game has 1 sound-effect!”. Being a Flowjam game is NOT an excuse here, as sound is one of the most important tools at a games disposal!
-“Did I mention that Joe has magic powers?” No, you didn’t.
-Enemies don’t despawn or disable at all, meaning enemies can attack you while off-screen and you have no way to counter it
-Speaking of enemies: They never stop spawning, and can spawn DIRECTLY on top of the player, causing health loss you couldn’t of possibly seen coming! This causes lag and unfair deaths CONSTANTLY

Scores (Scale of 1/5)

:eye:Visuals - 2.5 (Nothing’s cohesive, so everything is bland)
:speaker:Sound - 1 (What sound?)
:books:Story - 1.5 (Badly written filler)
:joystick:Controls - 2.5 (Desperately needs more options, like what you see in an RPG)
:anger:Difficulty - 1.5 (Garry’s Mod horror map)
:gear:Stability - 2 (Laggiest game on Flowlab, hands down)

Final Score: 1.5/5
Proof that a gimmick can’t carry a game alone. Sorry, @MrMcMemerMan

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all I have to say is that my cuscenes in after math told you how to progress

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RISE gives a great preview of what’s to come in future Vipertech titles: Immense detail, interesting stories and charming visuals. Now, all Flowlab has to do is be stable enough to support such games. Sigh

+This games resolution is of impressive girth
+The games main-menu is lifeless, but i’m saying that’s a positive since the logo’s bird-polishing-a-window gives it all the life it needs and besides that, the depressing-ass music tells me it’s intentional
+“Press Space to Skip” That’s a rare, and beautiful sight to see in a Flowlab game. Treasure it…
+“I have… An idea… Take this” Magically slaps a wand in his hand. This games humor is great
+The location cards are a nice touch
+The grass flattens under your weight, and pops back up a few seconds later. Small details like this make me coom
+The smooth camera is a simple, yet great touch
+The cave level is genuinally creepy, good work!

-The opening cutscene is charming, yet flawed. For starters, the test goes at a fixed speed, which makes some text take 1 second to read and 10 years to scroll-over, and others 10 years to read and 1 second to scroll-over. This is the ONE time automation is shit…
-The god-rays appear like they’re on a treadmill, which is admittedly funny, but you should’ve just took the cartoon approach and made them “Cycle”

*Bird polishing a window > Plague Doctor riding a wand
*I was unable to get past level 2 because Flowlab disabled jumping, and there’s a reason why. Simply put it, for technical reasons I don’t understand: Flowlab is inherently buggy due to differences in hardware and monitor, yet, however, rendering the game directly on your desktop fixes this on its own. See where I’m going with this? “Brower-only” Flowlab causes half of the bugs in most Flowlab games.

Scores (Scale of 1/5)

:eye:Visuals - 4 (Needs more detail)
:speaker:Sound - 4 (Needs more of it, but what’s there is great)
:books:Story - 4 (Simple, yet effective, story)
:joystick:Controls - 2.5 (Not a big fan)
:anger:Difficulty - 3 (I wouldn’t even know)
:gear:Stability - 2 (I completely blame Flowlab here)

Final Score: 4/5
Grazer, make a desktop version of Flowlab. “Browser only” is not a good thing.


I churned-out 2 game reviews today, but I wasn’t able to get to Beard Your Own Adventure before Grazer could announce a winner, ugh

Good luck to all the Flowjam participants!


Could you review the finished Ace Vanguard? I’ve added quite a few features since then.

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